Rachael Stirling has revealed the deeply personal reason she eats a tiny amount of her late mother Diana Rigg's ashes before opening-night performances, describing the unusual ritual as a way of feeling her mother's presence beside her on stage. She says the gesture helps calm her nerves and gives her a sense of connection to her mother during important theatrical moments.
The actress, whose mother became a household name through The Avengers and later Game of Thrones, began the practice after an emotional incident in her theatre dressing room. While the revelation has prompted surprise and criticism, Stirling insists the gesture feels natural to her, offering comfort as she continues a career that was so important to both of them.
Why Rachael Stirling Eats Her Mother's Ashes
In a first-person essay for The Guardian, published on 11 October 2026, Stirling explained that the ritual began on the opening night of Scandaltown at London's Lyric Hammersmith. It was an especially poignant return to the theatre because her mother had watched her perform there in Love, Love, Love—the last production Rigg saw before her death in September 2020.
Stirling had brought a small tube containing some of her mother's ashes into the theatre, initially keeping it in her dressing room. As the opening-night nerves mounted, she accidentally spilt a few grains onto her dressing table.
With her stage call approaching, she gathered what she could and put the ashes on her tongue. Rather than feeling uncomfortable, she found the spontaneous gesture reassuring. In that moment, she felt she had taken her mother with her onto the stage.
She repeated the experience as a ritual before subsequent opening nights and press performances. Stirling explained that having her mother close by helped her approach the stage with greater confidence.
A Personal Tribute to Diana Rigg
Rigg died aged 82 on 10 September 2020, leaving behind a celebrated career spanning theatre, film and television. She was best known to many viewers as Emma Peel in the 1960s series The Avengers and as Olenna Tyrell, the sharp-tongued Queen of Thorns, in Game of Thrones. She also played James Bond's wife in On Her Majesty's Secret Service.
For Stirling, however, Rigg was not simply an acclaimed performer. She was her mother, a woman whose influence shaped her life and professional ambitions. Stirling followed her into acting, despite acknowledging that Rigg initially disapproved of her career choice. Their relationship had its difficulties, but Stirling has said that their affection ultimately endured.
Her memoir, All About My Mother, explores that complicated bond and celebrates Rigg's wit, personality and extraordinary career. Published by John Murray, the book gives Stirling space to remember her mother beyond the public image of an award-winning actor.
From the Dressing Room to Broadway
The ritual has accompanied Stirling through several productions, including Noël Coward's Private Lives and Giant. When Giant transferred to Broadway in New York in March 2026, she brought the ashes with her.
Stirling has described how the practice now forms part of her pre-performance routine. While other actors might listen to music or do physical warm-ups before going on stage, she takes a tiny amount of the ashes as a private moment of remembrance.
She has also reflected on how much her mother would have enjoyed sharing those theatrical experiences. Rigg's own devotion to acting meant that the stage remained a powerful connection between them, even after her death.
Public Reaction to Her Unusual Ritual
Stirling admitted that she was taken aback by headlines portraying her as a cannibal after she revealed the habit. Reactions have ranged from discomfort to disgust, although she also recalled another bereaved woman responding with recognition and saying she did something similar.
Stirling has compared the ritual to an intensely personal act of faith. She does not present it as something others should imitate, but as a response to grief that makes sense within her own relationship with her mother.
Her account challenges the expectation that bereavement must follow familiar conventions. Some people scatter ashes in meaningful places, while others preserve keepsakes or maintain private traditions. For Stirling, this particular gesture offers a way to carry her mother's memory into the profession they both loved.
Ultimately, the story is less about shock than the bond behind the ritual. By taking a tiny amount of her mother's ashes before performances, Stirling feels that Rigg remains part of her journey. Despite the criticism, she has made clear that she intends to continue—a deeply personal tribute to a mother whose presence she still feels whenever she steps onto the stage.
All About My Mother by Rachael Stirling is published by John Murray. A news media outlet lists the book at £25.
