A woman in the UK says her husband of around 16 years stunned her by announcing plans for an Ibiza 'gaycation' with his brother-in-law to 'experience being gay'–despite insisting he is heterosexual.
The unusual marital dispute was discussed in a TikTok video posted by @thtfans after the woman described a private conversation in which her 42-year-old husband said he was considering a holiday with his 35-year-old brother-in-law, who is married to his sister.
According to the woman's account, her husband described a 'gaycation' as a trip where straight men go somewhere offering 'sun, sand and booze' and temporarily 'become gay'–while arguing that anything that happened would not 'count' because it took place during the 'gaycation'.
The woman said the couple have been married for around 16 years and have two sons, aged 15 and 10.
She described the couple as having stable careers, a good family life and a 'pretty decent sex life', before describing the conversation as surreal and mortifying.
@thtfans My (42F) husband (42M) has informed me he intends to go on a "gaycation" with his BIL (35M) in Ibiza. How do I handle this? Credit : @twohottakes #reddit_tiktok #storytelling #redditstorytime #redditreading #aita
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Husband Explains His Idea of a 'Gaycation'
According to the account discussed in the TikTok video, the conversation began on a Sunday after the woman had dropped their sons off at friends' homes.
She said her husband asked whether they had the house to themselves and whether she had a minute before sitting her down and producing a printed poster for 'some sort of orgy'.
He then reportedly began explaining his concept of a 'gaycation', which he allegedly described as a holiday where straight men travel somewhere with 'sun, sand and booze' and 'become gay' for the duration of the trip.
The woman said her husband was looking into booking a trip to Ibiza the following year with his brother-in-law, who is married to his sister, so they could experience it for themselves.
She said she was stunned and asked her husband directly whether he was gay.
According to her account, she told him that if he was, she would rather have an honest conversation about his sexuality and what it meant for their marriage.
She said he insisted he was '100% attracted to women' and still loved her and their two sons.
When she asked whether he might be bisexual, the woman said he became defensive and told her to 'drop the accusations'.
She said he argued that this was supposedly the 'beauty of the gaycation' because it allowed straight men to 'experience gayness without actually being gay'.
The woman also said her husband insisted he did not find men's bodies or genitals sexually exciting.
Wife Says Holiday Would Be Cheating
The woman said she told her husband she was uncomfortable with the proposed trip because, even if he were bisexual, she would regard sexual activity with another person as cheating.
According to her account, her husband became angry and again insisted that the trip would be different because of the supposed concept of a 'gaycation'.
She said she later asked him why he wanted to do it so badly if he had no sexual interest in men.
Her husband reportedly told her he was interested in understanding how gay men's lives differed from those of straight men.
He allegedly went further, saying that once a 'gaycation' began, it was impossible for a man to resist and that he would have to 'surrender himself, mind, body and soul' to it 'or be destroyed'.
The woman said her husband continued to speak about the idea matter-of-factly and insisted that straight men did it 'all the time', adding that he was supposedly doing it 'a bit late'.
She eventually told him that if he loved her, he could not go ahead with the trip and that their marriage would be over if he did.
The woman said her husband subsequently stopped mentioning the proposed holiday, but she remained concerned by what she perceived as his distress over the decision.
She claimed he did not go to work on the following Monday and worked only half a day the next day after telling colleagues he felt too unwell to work.
The woman said she believed her husband could potentially be bisexual, but said she would rather discuss his feelings openly than deal with what she described as an 'incredibly weird denialism' surrounding the proposed trip.
She also said she had not told her husband's sister about the idea and did not know how she would explain it to her.
The account does not establish that the Ibiza trip took place, that sexual activity was definitely planned or the man's sexual orientation beyond the woman's report that he described himself as heterosexual.
